Moose: I'm sick of this truck. It drinks gas and it's killing the environment.
Jeff: Yeah, it's like you're driving down the street saying, "Fuck the environment! Horsepower!"
Moose: I need a hybrid or something. Biodiesel. Green energy.
Jeff: You should ride a bike. That's better than green energy.
Moose: No, I should ride a horse. That's better than biodiesel.
Jeff: What if I rode an ostrich? Just rode down the street on an ostrich. Like, "You got a problem? This bird will peck your fucking eyes out."
Moose: See, that's practical.It's also a low carbon footprint. Unless of course the food you feed the ostriches has to be imported.
Jeff: No, I would just have a whole garage full of 'em. Just ride them until they die and then get on another one.
Moose: Then we could feed them to my horses.
Jeff: Would a horse eat an ostrich?
Moose: I don't know. I could ride elephants. I'm sure they'd eat an ostrich.
Jeff: Yeah. Elephants don't give a fuck about anything.